About Me

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Hi! I'm Eunice and I live in Bolton, Lancashire, with my two dogs Sophie and Sugar and an assortment of cats - well it used to be Sophie and Sugar, now it's Sophie and Poppie. I first began camping back in 1997 when my then partner took me to Anglesey for my birthday weekend. We slept in the back of the car - a hatchback - using the cushions off the settee at home as a mattress, and cooked and brewed up on a single burner camping stove. The site was good, the views were great, the weather fantastic and I was completely hooked. Following that weekend we got a two-man tent and some proper accessories and returned to Anglesey two weeks later, then over time we progressed to a three-man tent followed by an old trailer tent, then a new trailer tent, a campervan and finally a caravan. When my partner decided that the grass was greener on the other side of the street - literally - in April 2009 and I suddenly found myself alone after fifteen years, I decided there was no way I was going to give up camping and caravanning if I could cope on my own. This blog is the story of my travels, trials and tribulations since becoming a solo camper - I hope you like it

Thursday December 31st 2015 - From three back to two - losing Sam

This is one of the most difficult posts I've had to write on this blog, especially given the time year, but in the early hours of yesterday my lovely big dog Sam slipped into a sleep he didn't wake up from.

He had only been with me for six months - he came just after the sudden and unexpected death of my ex partner - but in that short time he achieved so much. Through correct feeding he lost almost all the excess weight he was carrying and went from being unable to get into my van without help to jumping in and out on his own, and although slower in pace than Sophie and Poppie he was still able to go for fairly long walks in the countryside near home. He was a very placid and patient dog and would stand for ages while I brushed him; he loved children and adults alike and was always happy for people to make a fuss of him when we were out. He went camping with me twice in the last six months, loved his walks along the beach at California in September and enjoyed several dips in the sea while we were there.

A couple of weeks ago he became quite lethargic and went off his normal food; a check up at the vet's showed that although he had a heart murmur which he must have had for quite some time there was nothing else wrong and he wasn't in any pain - at thirteen years old he was just naturally coming to the end of his life. There was nothing I could do for him other than give him whatever tasty food he would eat, take him out for very short walks and make sure he was always comfortable in his bed; at Christmas he got a new collar, a packet of the soft chew sticks he liked, and some freshly-cooked chicken for his supper. His last walk was a very slow one just a few yards along the street on Monday this week then he just lay quietly in his bed and I knew it was only a matter of time before he left me. I nursed him almost constantly on Tuesday and it broke my heart when he went to sleep for the very last time. 

Sam may have only been with me for six short months but that doesn't make the pain of losing him any easier - if anything it makes it worse as we had such a strong and loving bond between us right from the day he came to me, strengthened by having been a big part of each other's lives in previous years. I knew this day would come eventually but I didn't think it would be so soon and it hurts like crazy; there's a big Sam-sized space in my living room right now and an even bigger hole in my heart which will take a long time to heal.




Sleep tight Sam, my special friend, I'll love and miss you always  xx



22 comments:

  1. Tigermouse, I am so sorry on the loss of your doggy friend, You have shown us some awesome picture of him and what a wonderful dog he was. Rest in Peace Sam.
    Yvonne.

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  2. Thank you Yvonne.

    The first three photos were actually taken seven years ago and are some of the best ones I have of Sam - the other two were taken on my most recent camping holiday in September, coincidentally at the same camp site and on the same beach. He loved it there and I'm glad I was able to take him back.

    Sam was one very special dog for many reasons and I'll miss him terribly.

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  3. So sorry to read this, Eunice. I know how painful losing a pet can be. Thinking of you.
    Anabel's Travel Blog

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  4. Thank you Anabel. I feel so sad and empty just now, hence why no Happy New Year post this time. I'm so glad Sam had Christmas though.

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  5. So sorry for your loss. It's hard when we lose a 4 legged companion.
    Bless you for giving him a wonderful six months.

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  6. Thank you Sandra. I just wish Sam could have stayed with me for longer - unfortunately no-one can stop the march of time but at least the last few months of his life were happy ones.

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  7. Oh, Eunice. I'm so sorry to hear this. From what you've written before, as well as today, I know how special Sam is for you. It's not just for him that you mourn.
    How great it was that you were able to take him to the same beach that he enjoyed so much.
    How are Poppie and Sophie doing without him? I hope they are able to bring you some comfort in your sadness.

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  8. Sophie and Poppie are doing fine thanks. I don't think they are missing Sam too much as they have each other, and they've now taken to sharing the same bed instead of each being in their own.

    Sam has been buried in the shade of the tree at the bottom of the back garden so theoretically he'll be with me for as long as I live here, but it's not the same as him actually being here. Concentrating on Sophie and Poppie will help though.

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  9. Dear Eunice,

    Oh my and I'm very sorry to read of the departing of your beloved dog, Sam. I know that Sam will live in your heart forever. You have laid Sam to rest in a place of significance. Sam, always loved, never forgotten.

    Look after your good self, Eunice.

    In kindness,

    Gary x

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    1. Thank you Gary.

      Sam was a very special dog in many ways and it's hard to believe he's gone, but he will always have a special place in my heart.

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  10. Big hugs to you, Eunice. My heart goes out to you. You and Sam needed each other at the right time. No doubt Sam was most grateful that you brought him back to where he could roam freely without pain.

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    1. Thank you Su-sieee.

      I'm glad I was able to give Sam a good life and a loving home in the short time he was with me, I only wish I'd had him for longer than six months.

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  11. Sorry to hear of your loss, losing a pet is no different than a member of family, the grief is exactly the same. Chin up girl.

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  12. Thanks Jools. I know I'll get over it in time - Sophie and Poppie will help with that - but it'll take a while.

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  13. I'm so sorry to hear this. He was a beautiful boy! We adopted a maybe-10-year-old lab mix a couple weeks ago, and I'm already so attached to him... I'm sure that the six months you had him were some of the happiest of Sam's life.

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  14. Thanks Ally. Sam was a very handsome dog with the most gorgeous brown eyes, everyone who met him said how beautiful he was. He was a big part of my life for six years before the split with my ex so I'm glad he was able to spend his last six months with me.

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  15. Oh Eunice, I am sat here with tears streaming down my face. I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of Sam, I know how much you loved him and cared for him in such a short space of time. To me there's nothing worse than the loss of your best friend and companion. It will be 2 years next month since we lost Paddy and I still have tears most days. It's just so hard. On a positive note, he'll now be with your ex again running happily and pain free. Hope they find Paddy and have fun with him too up there until we all meet again. Take care. Sharon xx

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  16. I can't believe it's already two years since you lost Paddy; it's twelve months now since I lost little Sugar and it still hurts. Sam was a very special dog in many ways and though he was only with me for such a short time I'll never forget him.

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  17. I'm so sorry for your loss. He'll always have a special place in your heart.

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  18. Thank you Eileen. Today while I was cleaning out the van ready for its mot I found a tuft of Sam's fur in the door pocket - I don't know how it got there but it made me cry as I still miss him very much.

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  19. Hi Eunice, since "meeting you" on UKCS I have been to the beginning of your blog and read nearly all of your posts, and now I am back to where I started so it is time to leave another comment :-}

    You're not daft - you know you gave Sam the most outstanding last few months and in that top photo he looks like a completely different boy from the tired, overweight chap who came to you. Losing any of our animals always hurts, and I hope you're feeling better now.

    If you'd like to get in touch privately (I cannot see a way of sending you a PM via this blog or through UKCS) then I have an email contact box on my own blog. It would be good to hear from you.

    hugs from me and Daisy would also contribute but we are just back from a walk at Crummock Water and she's tired!

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  20. Thanks for the comment Jayne, I hope you enjoyed reading my blog from the beginning. Thanks too, for the invitation to get in touch with you - I'll certainly do that, and I'll tell you a bit more about Sam.

    I hope by the time you read this Daisy has recovered from her walk - give her a hug from me :)

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I really appreciate good comments - who doesn't? - but due to a recent tide of spam from anonymous readers all comments will now be moderated, and only those with a direct bearing on this blog will be published. I'm sure my regular blog readers/commenters will understand the need for this - and to anyone whose comment isn't published, you know why.